Death

I like to hug people, and be close to people. I've even been told that my hugs are part of my ministry. It is good to show love to people when they need it. However, I've been challenged recently that a lot of the time, when I do hug people, It's me that wants the hug. I hate to admit it, but I didn't really stop to think much about whether they wanted it or not. So... I'm not actually giving a hug. I'm taking a hug.

C.S. Lewis said "Humility is not thinking less of yourself but thinking of yourself less" and this is part of it. Not what I need. Not what I want. I have to admit, I didn't think it was possible. After all. I can't live without the things I need. That's the definition of need isn't it?

Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain : John 12v24

This is an encouragement to let go. To fall to the ground and die. Someone read this verse out at church a few weeks ago, and it really spoke to me. I imagined myself, a grain of wheat. Clinging to the stalk. Clinging to my comforts. If I don't have what I need then I'll die! But what happens to a grain of what when it falls to the ground and dies? IT GROWS!

Falling to the ground is a passive act. Let go of the comforts. Let go of your needs. You'll find that you can live without them. If you let go, you will be cut off from the sun, the air and the light. (I'm speaking mataphorically. Please don't go and bury yourself alive) I can promise you that you won't like it. That's ok. Don't give up. Let yourself fall all the way to the ground. And die. Don't worry about your needs. If we don't give up our attachment, we remain dependant, small, weak and useless. And alone.

When a seed dies, that only means that it's life as a seed is over. God breathes new life into broken seeds. New as in different. New as in better. God sends rain to refresh and fulfill, and the seed will grow into an entirely new shape. It will break out into the sun, which will warm and nourish it. A seed cannot refresh itself, but can only let the sun and the rain do their work. New shape means new purpose, and new seeds.